Personal Communication Barriers: Are they hindering your progress?

“The art of communication is the language of leadership.” — James Humes

Strong relationships are forged through effective communication. Yet, many of us face personal communication barriers that we may or may not be aware of that can prevent us from expressing ourselves clearly and understanding others.  I have taught Executive courses on ‘Effective Communication,’ at Strathmore University Business School (SBS) and my students have always stated that improving their communication skills is a top priority for their career development.

Charting a path to establishing clearer connections in both personal and professional settings can be fraught with many difficulties especially if an individual lacks self-awareness and a deeper understanding of other people. Anthony Robbins, an author and world-renowned motivational speaker said, ‘To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.’

Perception and Self-Awareness

When we communicate, we are constantly encoding and decoding messages. Perception barriers arise from the differences in how individuals perceive and interpret information. Since everyone has their own unique set of experiences, cultural background, emotions, and cognitive biases, their interpretation of a message can differ significantly from the sender’s intent. In our various Leadership programs as SBS, we unpack common perception barriers and help people to gain a deeper understanding of themselves and other people through a series of exercises that have been game-changing for our participants. Bringing awareness to unconscious barriers can radically improve one’s ability to communicate and build vital relationships.

Decoding the Unspoken

Paul Watzlawick, an Austrian-American communication theorist, famously said, ‘You can’t not communicate.’Nonverbal communication, such as body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice, plays a huge role in how messages are received. Nonverbal cues often carry more weight than words themselves. However, misinterpreting these cues can lead to confusion and conflict. You need to become conscious of the cues that you are constantly perceiving as well as the cues you are transmitting. Be mindful of your own body language and facial expressions and consider how they are being perceived. I have coached many new managers that were completely oblivious to the cues they were transmitting. Their body language, facial expressions and mannerisms did not match the messages their carefully selected words were trying to get across. This led to distrust, confusion and a breakdown in relationships.

 The right way to listen

Simon Sinek, an inspirational speaker, has always urged his followers to ‘Be the last one to speak.’ People have a natural inclination to express themselves. They have an inner desire to feel ‘heard and understood.’ Listening the right way can help people connect on a deeper level and establish trust and rapport. I cringe when I watch shows where panellists interrupt each other and talk over each other all in a desperate attempt to get their opinions heard. When the cacophony of voices becomes so chaotic that you just want to change the channel because you cannot understand anything anymore because they are all talking at once, you wonder what the point of was even starting this discussion.

Communication is not just about getting your opinion heard, it is equally about listening. One of the most common barriers to effective communication is poor listening. Often, people focus on what they are going to say next rather than fully absorbing what the other person is saying.

Digital disconnect

In an increasingly digital world, technology can both enhance and hinder communication. Whether it is a technical issue during a virtual meeting or the lack of face-to-face interaction, these barriers can make it difficult to communicate effectively. Misunderstandings are rampant when typed messages are interpreted in a completely different way from what the sender intended. Have you ever had to really scrutinize an emoji someone has sent you to decipher what the sender was really trying to communicate. Abbreviated messages sent digitally can also pose great difficulties to interpretation. Learning digital etiquette and avoiding sending careless messages can save your career. Video calls can mimic in-person communication and are better mediums for the exchange of important messages when the parties involved are separated by distance. Wherever possible schedule time for in-person meetings to convey sensitive and important information.

Emotional Intelligence

Can you recognize and manage your own emotions and the emotions of others? Navigating sensitive situations, handling conflict effectively and empathizing with others is critical for career success. The wrong words, a poorly handled emotional reaction or a lack of empathy can derail your relationships. For you to be a good communicator, you need to be in control of your emotions and be able to sense and respond to the emotions of others appropriately. Make this is a priority. Develop your emotional intelligence. You will reap the rewards, if you put in the work.

Do not hold yourself back if you lack communication skills. Attending courses or working with a Coach can help you to become a powerful and impactful communicator. Working on overcoming your personal barriers will help you transcend the obstacles to your success.

Article by Shailja Sharma, SBS Faculty Member and Leadership and Career Coach